Chunkin’ the Funk: How I Beat the Blues With 20 Words

Who got tha funk?

We got tha funk!

HHHAYYY…Get down…Get Funkay… Turn Around…a-Good God Y’all.

Keep goin’ down…and a-goin’ down…and a-goin’ down…Now STOP!

Thanks, Funkmeister. That will be enough. I have had plenty of funk for the time being.

The look of frustration

Man, I have really been in the dumps lately–in a funk–in a windstorm of insanity. I tend to be a pretty private person as part of my general disposition, so I usually don’t air out my personal frustrations to the public, aside from petty ones. You know, “Oh Noes! I done burned the dinner.” (I didn’t really). Let me tell ya, though, the last couple of months have been a complete train wreck. I had pretty much hit the wall a few nights ago until…

Well, let me back up.

I think the hardest thing we humans deal with is change. I’m ok with change. In fact I deal with it really well. That is, of course, if it keeps a normal pace. However, I have a hard time dealing with a whole dump truck of ice water being poured on me at once, which has been the case lately.

The dump truck contains: my going back to work from being a stay-at-home dad, putting our baby in daycare, a baby with EXTREME separation anxiety, house-wide illness for weeks, a baby waking up every morning in diarrhea for a week, trying to get a business off the ground only to realize I’m probably going to have to get a “real job” on top of it, unforeseen financial trouble, my wife’s changing companies and  being out of state twice, back trouble, doing business taxes for the first time, a squirrel in the attic, and finding out we’ll be welcoming our 3rd child in September.

Whew! What explicit detail!

Now, let’s not misconstrue this as a self-serving “poor me” rant. I’m not looking for individual sympathy. It would be selfish of me to exhaust this forum without a universal point, which is:  We ALL go through these periods when it seems we’ve won Hell’s lottery. Despite our best efforts and careful planning, things can still run wildly amok. This type of unsettling locomotive stress seems to hit me about every two years. Everything usually turns out fine, but it’s hard to ward off the emotional funk that comes from simply dealing with it all.

So what do you do to shake these intense blues? Sometimes it just takes stepping out your own comfort zone a little. Now, back to where I hit the wall.

I was sitting here alone a few nights ago. My wife was in Michigan, and I just felt like puke–Not like puking–like puke itself–physically and emotionally exhausted puke. So I took a deep breath and, against my nature, fired off a tweet about the way I was feeling:

In no time I had the support of two fellow #DadsRT folks: James @JamesHudyma and BrickWade @Brickwade. And to my surprise and delight, I found out I wasn’t alone.

In 20 words James had said something so profound in its simplicity that it completely brightened my outlook. 1.) He was going through it too. 2.) Enough is enough already. A surge of relief came over me knowing someone else was in misery and that they too needed cheering up. James, Brickwade, and I chit-chatted about things for a moment and that was that.

I slept like a log that night and woke up feeling like a new man. I went to work here at home the next morning, put on some inappropriate rap music, and danced around my living room off and on throughout the day. My wife knew I was feeling better because I started sending her a string of ridiculous texts.  She knew I had been really down and was happy to see me in high spirits. At least she and I had been getting along great.

Had I not let my guard down a little and gotten out of my “comfort zone,” which is really secret code for “misery zone,” I wouldn’t have known the resolution 20 words (and a good night’s sleep) would bring. It was like a warm ray of sunshine. Things still suck, but hey, time to cheer up now. Funkmeister banished.

Do you go through periods where you are overwhelmed and you can’t get out of the dumps?

What has helped you get out of it? Was it something simple like a pat on the back or a good laugh or did it take a while?

Does your family help or do they tend to drag down with you?

Have you ever reached outside of your comfort level to find help?


The Beginning
About Jared Tullos

Husband and Father to 3. Doodler, Tinkerer, Stinkerer. Regional Standout in Staying Alive the Goodest.

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  1. Brickwade says:

    And a new avi to boot! Glad to help. Takes a village, man.

  2. James Hudyma says:

    Takes a lot of courage to openly reach out. I’m proud of you and happy that my commiserating helped you ditch the funk.

    • Jared T says:

      Yes, it can take a lot for someone like me who tries to shoulder as much as I can alone to reach out to others. I thought opening up in this post was important so that other family men/women know that involvement in peer groups like Dads Round Table REALLY does help, and sometimes it’s the simple things that make the biggest difference. Thanks for the support!

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