Stuff My Kids’ Say & Yoda’s Hearing

My children are at an age — 4 & 3 — where the world is entirely new to them and they are soaking up new and exciting bits of knowledge every few minutes. It can lead to some interesting conversations, like why people die, why I have a bigger butt than they do and, most interestingly, when all the continents are going to smash together and whether we’ll survive it.

Here’s an example — we watched the original “Star Wars” movie the other day and my almost 5-year-old set a record by asking 277 questions before Obi-Wan even told the Stormtroopers that these were “Not the droids you’re looking for.”

Here are a few of my favorite gems that have come out of their mouths recently:

“The clouds are the sun’s friends.” This makes me think of the sun and clouds holding hands, taking long walks and when the clouds cover the sun, maybe they’re playing hide and seek.

“I don’t want to nap. I want to be happy.” Only a child would consider a nap a punishment.

“Your knee is your leg’s elbow.” Fascinating. Sounds like one of those “Shower Thoughts” gems.

“Do dwarfs live on dwarf planets?” This question made me jump into a rabbit hole that I’m still trying to climb out of.

“I bet Yoda has really great hearing.” Well, obviously. His ears are the size of Dumbo’s.

“A bra is a booby protector.” And thank goodness for the protection they provide.

“Why do you want us to be maniacs?” I think he meant “mannequins.” That makes more sense.

“When I put this Magic Band on will I be a Superhero?” We heard this gem as we arrived at Disney World and fastened our Magic Band’s to our wrists. We told him “Yes,” by the way.

“I love my Mommy and she’s gonna dance with me at my wedding.” Our oldest loves his mommy. In fact, I think he thinks he’s gonna marry her. Too late, she’s taken.

And then, of course, there are the scatological sayings:

“I’m making a Batman cave out of Poopy.” I’m not even sure what this means. And no, my 3-year-old did not make a Batcave out of his feces.

“Poopy Daddy/Stupid Daddy.” A toddler slam that almost always lands him in time out.

Got any verbal gems from your little ones? Please share them below.

(Photo credit: niallkennedy / Photo / CC BY-NC)


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About Happiest Daddy

Two boys, one wife and a ton of material. I live for family and I'm one of the most blessed people you will ever meet.

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